Welcome To Hockeytown
by fourandtwenty
Summary: In honor of the Red Wings' victory and the Stanley Cup, a story about a certain pair of Slytherins going to none other than Game 5. Full lyrics to Without Stanley included-not meant to offend any Avs/Canes fans.


**Welcome To Hockeytown**  
  
In honor of the Red Wings winning the Stanley Cup tonight (June 13th, 2002), here's a little ficlit that's truly ridiculous in all aspects. If nothing else, check out the song at the end. I'm from Detroit, and good lord is it crazy out there right now, even at two in the morning! Are there any other Red Wings fans out there? There has to be... absolutely must. Well, all I have to say is that unless you live here, you really can't understand how crazy everyone here is about the Red Wings. Canada isn't Hockeytown, folks--Detroit is.  
  
Aimée  
  
  
---  
  
  
"I can not believe you dragged me here, Mr. Malfoy."  
  
Severus Snape stood next to his now-grown pupil, clutching a red and white jersey tightly in his pale hands. The two Slytherins were standing in front of a massive building, both part of a sea of red and white fanatics, many of whom were wearing large tin cups as hats.   
  
"Live a little, Professor," Draco grinned as he pushed forward through the excited crowd to walk up to one of the many entrances to the Joe Louis Arena, home of the Detroit Red Wings. It had been a spontaneous decision, made just over an hour before; Draco had somehow come across two tickets to Game 5 of the hockey—a game in which he'd never heard of before—finals. Never mind the fact all tickets were virtually sold out and not even a man dressed as Jesus the pair had seen wandering around, followed by television cameras, could get an extra.   
  
Mass excitement was everywhere as both men pushed their way through the crowd, the wide smile on Draco's face more than making up for the scowl on Snape's. The seats were more than difficult to find, and it was only a quarter of an hour until face-off when the two finally stumbled across them, two lone seats in a sea of fans waving banners and signs, faces painted and enough jerseys the NHL could have ever used.   
  
"So who do you think will win?" Draco asked mildly, a smirk playing across his lips as he watched those around them scream themselves hoarse.   
  
"In this crowd?" Snape sneered, waving his hand around in a disgusted manner. "It'd be suicide to even hint that their team will lose."  
  
"The Wings then," Draco nodded in agreement, standing with his hands on his hips as he surveyed the crowd. "Their offensive lineup is more than a match for the Hurricanes, and even though they've had a fairly even winning between the two teams during face-off, Hasek's an amazing goalie. Irbe's good, of course, but he's no match for Hasek or Roy. Did you hear about the last game of the playoffs between the Wings and the Avs? Roy let in something like five or six of goals, and he's supposed to be the best in the league!"  
  
Snape stared blankly at the younger man, at a complete lose. "I didn't understand a word you just uttered, Mr. Malfoy."  
  
"Hockey, Professor," Draco stated in a matter-of-fact tone. "It's a Canadian sport, although you wouldn't be able to guess by the fanatics in the States."  
  
"I don't care what it's called," Snape muttered, eyeing the large man wearing a Hull jersey and one of the tin cups for hats he had seen earlier. "It's a muggle sport, one in which I have no wish to take part in."  
  
"Dry up," Draco nudged the bitter man in the shin with his foot. "For once, just relax and have a bit of fun."  
  
Snape sighed in contempt for both the game and the boy who had insisted he go as lights started flashing. A moment later, the once-empty ice rink just a few meters below them filled with red and white as the two teams skated out. He hadn't even noticed the women beforehand singing what Draco had assumed to be the American National Anthem at the top of her lungs.   
  
"It's time!" Draco yelled excitedly over the crowd so Snape could hear him. All of the fanatics surrounding the two of them stood up at that exact moment, leaving Snape with little choice as he stood up to join the crowd.  
  
He found the game to be surprisingly exciting, although he was sure he'd never admit it to anyone—not even himself. Each time one of the large men on skates carrying funny-shaped sticks came near one of the goals with the small black disk, the crowd either yelled encouragements in one massive sound wave or groaned and hissed with anger. Snape quickly caught on to the fact the team in the white jerseys were the one he was supposed to be supporting, so in a purely self-protection move, he rooted for them along with the rest of the crowd.  
  
By the end of the first twenty minutes of playing, Draco was nearly hoarse with yelling, but adrenaline pumped through his veins as he watched the period end with no goals scored. Turning to Snape, he grinned, showing off a set of straight white teeth.  
  
"Hungry?"  
  
  
  
  
  
Armed with two hotdogs and a large container that could only be described as a jug full of Coke each, the two made their way back to their seats just as the beginning of the second period started. About four minutes in, a sudden swell of noise coming from the crowd informed the pair something exciting was happening. A group of players were gathered around the Caroline goal and finally, with a roar of surprise, the disk Snape now knew to be a puck was shot in between the goalie's legs and into the net, scoring the first goal of the game.   
  
The entire arena shook with the noise coming from the crowd and for an irrational moment, Snape thought the roof might collapse from the vibrations. The large man next to him grabbed his arm and dragged him into a standing position, all the while spitting excitedly at him and jumping up and down. Snape cringed away from the man and moved towards Draco, who was also pumping his fists in celebration.  
  
"We scored!" Draco yelled happily, his blonde hair falling into his eyes. Snape forced a tight smile as the game continued. Deciding to stand back up, he crossed his arms and tried his best to look menacing, all the while paying perhaps a bit too much attention to the game.  
  
  
  
  
  
The puck came out of nowhere sometime during the middle of the second period. One moment Snape had been standing next to him, his arms crossed and expression annoyed, but his eyes glittering with untold excitement, the next he was nowhere to be seen.   
  
Draco looked down and, for one horrific moment, thought his Potions professor was dead. On his forehead was a diagonal cut dripping blood onto the concrete floor, a hockey puck lying on the floor in between the large man's legs.   
  
"Bloody hell!" Draco swore as he bent down to make sure his professor was still breathing. An official looking man elbowed his way through the aisle carrying a large white case, presumably holding first-aid materials.  
  
"Only you, Professor," Draco shook his head. "Only you could find a way to put yourself in danger at a hockey game."  
  
  
  
  
  
Snape came to an indefinite amount of time later, his vision blurry and head throbbing. It took him a moment to realize where he was, but when he did, he sat up immediately and faced Draco, who was standing next to him, watching the game through a glass window. He was lying on a soft leather couch, a bandage on his head and a package of unused smelling salts lying on the armrest above the place his head had been resting.  
  
"What's the score?"  
  
Draco turned to him with a snort, his gray eyes laughing. "It's two-one, Wings, only five minutes left. How's your head?"  
  
"Fine," Snape muttered, standing up despite the sharp, dizzying pain shooting through his head. Even though his sight was still a bit blurry, he could just make out a fairly large object being thrown out on the ice, and the roar of the crowd was once again heard throughout the stadium. "What's that?"  
  
"An octopus," Draco sneered slightly. "A rather disgusting tradition of this particular team is to throw an octopus out onto the ice. It all started when a fan threw one out in the playoff games of—"  
  
"I didn't ask for a history lesson," Snape snapped rather harshly. "Muggles are monsters sometimes, aren't they?"  
  
"No more than we are for using all of the potion ingredients we do and subjecting people to Dementors," Draco pointed out calmly. The two watched game for a minute before Snape saw a most peculiar thing—the Carolina goalie had left his post.  
  
"Isn't the man supposed to be guarding that net?" Snape asked curiously, raising an eyebrow in obvious disapproval.  
  
"The coaches can pull a goalie to add another member to the offense and—"  
  
Draco's explanation was cut off as the puck shot into the unguarded net, boosting the score to three-one. The roar of the crowd was absolutely unreal; every single Red Wings fan knew at that point their team had won the game.  
  
Draco never did finish his explanation, for at that time, a chubby man poked his head into the box. "I see you've woken up," he commented dryly. "We couldn't find the puck for you, I'm sorry."  
  
"That's quite all right," Draco nodded, and Snape noticed his hand was clenched around his wand. Before any magic could emit from the piece of wood, however, the chubby man walked further into the room, a sudden look of wonder on his face.  
  
"Are you from England?"  
  
"Yes," Draco replied, thinking that much was obvious. "Why do you ask?"  
  
The man shook his head incredulously, "You mean to tell me you two have flown in all the way from England to watch the game?"  
  
"Err—" Draco was at a loss for words. Rather, he simply nodded mutely and watched the man's expression change from one of awe to one of excitement.  
  
"Come!" the man suddenly exclaimed, gesturing at them to follow him. "I've never met any British Wings fans—I didn't know there were any—perhaps—yes…"   
  
Draco shrugged towards Snape as the two of them followed the chubby man, neither having a clue as to where he was taking them. They walked down quite a few flight of—for the most part, Draco noticed—empty staircases that held official looking warning signs on each of the entrances warning fans to stay out, as it was a restricted area.   
  
Six different turns and three locked doors later, the two found themselves in what absolutely had to have been the Red Wings' locker room. Neither had much time to soak in their surroundings, however, as the chubby man gestured them forward into another hall. With each step, the swell of sound grew louder, and with a sudden roar from the crowd, the pair knew the game was over; the Wings had won not only the game, but the finals and the Stanley Cup—  
  
—Which was standing right next to them.  
  
"After the carpet's rolled out, you two go out onto the ice, all right?" the chubby man instructed. Draco nodded numbly, awed by the sight of the Holy Grail of hockey.   
  
The two followed as instructed and no less than a quarter of an hour later, they were out on the ice amidst reporters, players, and various others all milling around the confetti-strewn ice. They watched as the Most Valuable Player—Lidstrom—was announced and waited as the Red Wings players and Scotty Bowman skated around the ice holding the Stanley Cup high above their heads, both in a mild state of shock   
  
  
  
  
  
The crowds eventually dissipated and the two Apparated to what they had believed to be a deserted part of the city, only to find themselves suddenly surrounded by hordes of excited fans, most with drinks in hands.  
  
"Bloody hell," Draco cursed once more, glancing over at his professor. "What are we supposed to do now?"  
  
Before he could receive a response, a man holding a microphone tapped him on the shoulder. "Were you at the game tonight?"  
  
"Yes," Draco responded without thinking. "We were on the rink when they presented the Cup as well."  
  
The man grinned and thrust the microphone into the blonde's face, but it was too crowded for Draco to take a step back to avoid the man. "Why don't you tell all of Hockeytown and Channel 955's listeners what it was like?"  
  
  
  
  
  
"This is bloody amazing," Draco shook his head an hour later as the two walked the streets of downtown Detroit. People were everywhere; on the streets, on cars, even a few were attempted to climb up light poles that had obviously been greased the hours before the game.   
  
"They don't call this town Hockeytown for nothing," Snape shook his head, quoting the DJ that had cornered Draco an hour before. "Personally, I'm amazed there are truly this many people who care enough about the Red Wings and hockey to celebrate."  
  
"They're everywhere," Draco nodded in agreement. As they walked under a lamp, Draco turned towards his professor and took a good look at him for the first time that night. With a sudden choke, he slapped his hand over his mouth and his eyes widened. Snape wasn't amused.  
  
"What is the matter, Mr. Malfoy?"  
  
"You—your forehead!" Draco cackled, his pale cheeks flushing with laugher. "Looks like you're going to be joining the ranks of Potter soon, Professor. The cut on your head's shaped like a lightening bolt."  
  
Snape's eyes widened as well as his hand immediately went up to touch the stinging cut upon his forehead.  
  
"Welcome to Hockeytown, Professor."  
  
  
  
---  
  
_Steve Yzerman scores from 'round the outside_  
_'Round the outside, 'round the outside_  
_Chris Chelios scores from 'round the outside_  
_'Round the outside, 'round the outisde_  
  
_Guess who's back_  
_Back again_  
_Stanley's back_  
_We will win_  
_Guess who's back, guess who's back_  
_Guess who's back, guess who's back_  
_Guess who's back, guess who's back_  
_Guess who's back_  
  
_[Shot, score!]_  
  
_McCarty scored his first hat trick_  
_And nobody wants to see Patrick no more_  
_They want Hasek_  
_Roy's chopped liver_  
_Well if you want Stanley this is what we'll give you_  
_Another victory_  
_Nothing can be bigger_  
  
_Hockey can jumpstart this town quicker than a shot_  
_When it gets blocked off from Hasek's goal_  
_And it gets knocked into the stands_  
_He's got them saying "I can't believe all the fucking shots he's saving!"_  
  
_We rated us wrong and we're not complaining_  
_Cause we're back on the ice and Dominating_  
_It may be that you can stop our reign_  
_But the Red Wing's hotstreak is not yet fading!_  
  
_So the referee won't let us be_  
_Calling penalties_  
_So let me see_  
_We score short handed on a five on three_  
_But it feels so empty without Stanley_  
  
_So get out of your seat_  
_Stand up on your feet_  
_Get pumped you're going to see another defeat_  
_Get rowdy cuz we're all about to party_  
_Starting planning the parade_  
_Thank you Scotty!_  
  
_Now this looks like a job for Detroit_  
_Everyone just follow Steve_  
_Cuz we need another cup, can't you see?_  
_Cuz it feels so empty without Stanley_  
  
_ Now this looks like a job for Detroit_  
_ Everyone just follow Steve_  
_ Cuz we need another cup, can't you see?_  
_ Cuz it feels so empty without Stanley_  
  
_Vancouver, a bunch of pitiful losers_  
_They blew it, they knew it_  
_They couldn't be bluer_  
_Then Colorado took a stab at the cup_  
_So twenty-thousand fans in the stands yelled_  
_"YOU SUCK!"_  
  
_The semi-final ends on a highnote_  
_Remember Carolina, don't try to deny us!_  
_You'll never see another better team last_  
_It's a fact, we dropped the Avalanches down on their ass_  
  
_And it's a disaster, such a catastrophy_  
_For you to see a seven to nothing playoff masterpiece_  
_We're back, dananananananananana_  
_Here comes Shannahan he's on the center line again_  
_He's setting up a difinitive play so we can win it _  
  
_The center of attention_  
_Backing this, it could get interesting_  
_The best team's the Red Wings_  
_So let's sing this song until your head rings_  
  
_[Ladies and Gents, your attention please!]_  
  
_Because attention should be placed back in the ring_  
_Here's the best thing:_  
_The Red Wings can beat any team, any league_  
_Here comes Stanley!_  
  
_Now this looks like a job for Detroit_  
_ Everyone just follow Steve_  
_ Cuz we need another cup, can't you see?_  
_ Cuz it feels so empty without Stanley_  
  
_ Now this looks like a job for Detroit_  
_ Everyone just follow Steve_  
_ Cuz we need another cup, can't you see?_  
_ Cuz it feels so empty without Stanley_  
  
_Before we sacked it_  
_We'll go tic the tac it_  
_Any player on the bench while we're in action_  
_And that wussy Patrick, he just got his ass kicked_  
_So Hurricanes you'd better watch your back, you bastards!_  
  
_And Irbe, you can get stomped by Sergi_  
_Knocked unconscious, you'll be requiring first aid_  
_You can't hang, you suck_  
_So let go, it's over_  
_Hockey town rules, the others blow!_  
  
_So let's go, just give us the signal_  
_We'll be there with a whole team full of potential_  
_We end all, amazing when we're skating_  
_Ever since the first time we got the cup and we raised it!_  
  
_But since then man it just seems_  
_That everyone just wants to diss the Wings_  
_So this just shows the jealously_  
_But it's our team, we're just extreme!_  
  
_No we're not the first kings with hockey jerseys_  
_We are the best thing since '53's teams_  
_To play ice hockey, so graceful__ly_  
_And use it to make our fans happy_  
  
_Hey! There's a concept that works_  
_Twenty-million diehard Wings fans emerge_  
_But no matter how many teams in the league_  
_Only our team will bring home Stanley!_  
  
_Now this looks like a job for Detroit_  
_ Everyone just follow Steve_  
_ Cuz we need another cup, can't you see?_  
_ It feels so empty without Stanley_  
  
_Now this looks like a job for Detroit_  
_ Everyone just follow Steve_  
_ Cuz we need another cup, can't you see?_  
_ It feels so empty without Stanley_  
  
_Na na na na na, na na na na..._  
_Na na na, na Hasek na na..._  
_WINGS!_  
  
Without Stanley, to the tune of Eminem's Without Me. Seriously, there's a song out there like it, and all the radio stations here have been playing it 24/7. I love Hockey town.  
  
[No offense to any Vancouver, Colorado, or Carolina fans, of course. We just beat your asses, that's all.]  
  
...Have I mentioned Detroit fans are brutal?  



End file.
